Feminism · Life · Marriage

All the Married Ladies

My most recent trip to Chicago was actually a business trip for my husband that we tacked on a little pleasure. The trip allowed me a lot of time for reflection on what I used to do before my Z. days… the old days of dating and singleness. While there is a lot to be said for the joys of being in a committed partnership, I think single women (or at least me when I was single) can be much better about self-care and maintaining independence.

So here are some of the things I think women (or men too) should still be doing, even after we settle in to the comfort of exclusivity.

Go to dinner by yourself. Or lunch. Seriously. It’s much less awkward than you think and it is so relaxing to pick your favorite restaurant (especially if the SO doesn’t care for it) and indulge in a meal you love. And indulge. Get a glass of wine or that delicious app or eat that whole dessert by yourself. Savor the silence of just indulging yourself.


On the same note, go to a bar by yourself and savor being your sexy self.

Have a brownies/sweatpants/and trashy tv night with your best friend. Friendship is a lot like marriage. It takes work to keep communication and intimacy open. Don’t lose her, she is worth the effort. That’s why she is your bestie.

IMG_0365 (1)
How could she not be my bestie?!?!

Get the SO out of the house for a night and indulge in all your favorite, secret single girl activities. Mine is sitting around in my underwear, watching my 600 Pound Life, and eating an ENTIRE shrimp cocktail platter for dinner. I’ll probably take way too long of a bath and have a facial at the same time. You don’t get to eat like you did when you’re single… indulge in eating a box of cereal for dinner or popcorn or Cheese Its… whatever it is.

Go buy a new date outfit. Anyone else ever go shopping before a big date? I loved that feeling. Only now I am completely free to indulge in what I find sexy, without even pretending to consider if the mystery man would like my new dress.


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